Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
Randomize
