I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
someone owes me an orgasm
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
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