so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
the new term for farting is butt boxing.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
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