at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
Randomize
