Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
Randomize
