what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Randomize
