I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
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