What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
Randomize
