I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
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