i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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