Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
Randomize
