If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
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