i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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