her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
