That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
