Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
Randomize
