I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
Randomize
