i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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