I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize