I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
