I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
