y did u give ur computer a hand job?
To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
Randomize