Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
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