just tell him i said nine months
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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