That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
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