Nicole vs. Life
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
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