hotel room ftw
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
Randomize
