If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
Randomize
