Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
Randomize
