these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
