stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
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