We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
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