I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
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