i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize
