it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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