stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
Randomize
