So drunk its hurt
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
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