I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
