turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
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