So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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