new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
