We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
my phone needs a breathalizer
My pussy is not your playground.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
The Olympian is in my bed
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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