Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
Randomize
