I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
You're completely useless in the revolution.
This house was built for laser tag.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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