what day is it and did you see me today?
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
Text me some of your sweat
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
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