saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
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