I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
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