just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize
