You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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