exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
someone owes me an orgasm
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
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