whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
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